9 types of girlfriends

Whether you are dating a 18 yr old girl or 99 year old woman, your girl will always fall into one of the following categories.... Funny!!!

1. Ms. Nice Girl
   "Tickets to the boxing match? Oh, darling, you shouldn't have!" Also known as: Whattagal, Precious, one of the boys, My Main Squeeze or Doormat.
   Advantages: Cheerful, agreeable, kindly
   Disadvantages: May wise up someday
2. Old Yeller
   "You spineless good-for-nothing drag-arse no-talent son of a bitch! Can't you see you're making me miserable??" Also known as: She-Devil, Sourpuss, the Nag, My Old Lady or Warthog from Hell.
   Advantages: Pays attention to you
   Disadvantages: Screeches, throws frying pans
3. Sickly
   "Oh, my head. My head. My feet. My cramps. My cellulite." Also known as: Whiner, Mewler or Grumpy.
   Advantages: Predictable
   Disadvantages: Contagious
4. The Bosser
   "Stand up straight. Put on a different tie. Get a haircut. Change your job. Make some money. Don't give me that look." Also known as: Whipcracker, The Sarge, Ms. Know-it-all, Ball and Chain or Yes Mom
   Advantages: Often right
   Disadvantages: Often right, but so what?
5. Ms. Vaguely Dissatisfied
   "I just can't decide. Should I switch my career, goals, home, and hair color?" Also known as: The Fretter, Worrywart, Typical or Aw C'mon Honey.
   Advantages: Easily soothed
   Disadvantages: Even more easily perturbed
6. Wild Woman out of Control
   "I've got an idea. Lez get drunk an' make love onna front lawn. I done it before. S'fun." Also known as: Fast Girl, Freewheeler, Goodtime Charleena or Passed Out.
   Advantages: More fun than a barrel of monkeys
   Disadvantages: Unreliable; drives off cliffs
7. Huffy
   "I see nothing humorous in those silly cartoons you keep snickering at." Also known as: No Fun, Humorless Prig, Cold fish, Chilly Proposition, Iceberg or Snarly.
   Advantages: Your friends will feel sorry for you
   Disadvantages: You will have no friends
8. Woman from Mars
   "I believe this interpretive dance will explain how I feel about our relationship." Also known as: The Babbler, Spooky Girl, Screwball, Loony, Bad News or Artistic.
   Advantages: Entertaining, unfathomable
   Disadvantages: Will read her poetry aloud
9. Ms. Dreamgirl
   "I am utterly content with you just the way you are, my handsome genius of a boyfriend. I think we must make love like crazed weasels now!" Also known as: Ms. Right, Goddess, Knockout, Perfection or Gorgeous.
   Advantages: Funny, intelligent, uninhibited
   Disadvantages: Will have nothing to do with you.